The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent events in Syria and have therefore raised their security level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.” Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.” The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorised from “Tiresome” to “A Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the British issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.
The Scots have raised their threat level from “Pissed Off” to “Let’s get the Bastards.” They don’t have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.
– The indefatigable John Cleese[*], who is, in his words, “a British writer, actor, and tall person.” To read more about the current Terror Alert Levels of various countries, you can find the rest of Cleese’s notice here.
*As soon as I put this up I discovered that this was probably not written by Cleese, but by someone attempting to imitate his style of comedy and satire (at least according to Snopes.com). Still pretty funny.